45+ Sewing Jokes You’ve Never Heard!

Help Others Find This Post!

Hey fellow sewers…. looking for a laugh? These punny sewing jokes are sure to leave you in stitches!

I have been on the lookout for some funny sewing jokes and thought this would be a great way to test out these new fandangled AI tools everyone is talking about…

Can AI make a funny sewing joke? I “asked” chatgpt to come up with some silly sewing puns and jokes for us…Let’s see how it did below!

This post may contain affiliate links. Read the full disclosure here.

Note: If you like this post you will also like 20+ quotes about sewing!

Sewing Jokes

• Why did the sewing machine go to therapy?
  It had too many tension issues!
• How do you organize a sewing party?
  You thread the needle and invite all the fabric friends!
• Why did the sewing needle break up with the safety pin?
  It thought the pin was too sharp for its liking!
• What did the fabric say to the sewing machine needle?
  “You’ve got me in stitches!”
• Why did the sewing pattern go to school?
  It wanted to be a well-thread individual!
• What do you call a sewing machine that sings?
  A seren-stitcher!
• Why did the sewing scissors get an award?
  They always make the cut!
• What’s a seamstress’s favorite type of exercise?
  Cross-stitch fit!
• Why do sewing enthusiasts make great detectives?
  They’re experts at following threads and finding the fabric clues!
• Why did the sewing thread go on a diet?
  It wanted to fit into smaller needles!

Sewing Puns & One Liners

• Life is sew much better with a needle in hand.
• Sewing: the art that stitches dreams.
• Sewing: the fabric of my life.
• Sew-cial distancing: when your fabric stays six feet away from the scissors.
• My sewing machine is my sewl mate.
• Fabric: the only thing that never judges your seams.
• Bobbin’ and weavin’ through my sewing projects.
• A seamstress sews the seeds of creativity.
• A stitch in time saves nine – and a lot of fabric, too.
• Life is short, but my fabric stash is endless.
• I have a love-hate relationship with my seam ripper.
• Sewists never have a shortage of ideas, only a shortage of time.
• Sewing is my superpower – I can create anything with just a needle and thread.
• Sewing is not a hobby, it’s a way of life.
• When life gives you scraps, make a quilt!

Embroidery Jokes

• Why did the embroidery pattern feel left out?
  It wasn’t included in the cross-stitch conversation!
• What do you call an embroidery project with a sense of humor?
  A stitch of laughter!
• Why did the embroidery hoop go to the gym?
  It wanted to stay in shape for all those tight stitches!
• What’s an embroiderer’s favorite type of music?
  Hip-hop stitches!
• Why was the embroidery machine upset?
  It was feeling a little threadful!
• What did the needle say to the embroidery floss?
  “You really thread the needle, my friend!”
• How do you describe a perfectly stitched embroidery piece?
  Sew-perb!
• What’s an embroiderer’s favorite dance move?
  The thread and needle twirl!
• Why did the embroidery design get an award?
  It was truly needle-worthy!
• What did the embroidery thread say to the fabric?
  “I’m here to add color and thread-vity!”

Sewing Themed Riddles

• I can mend holes without a sound,
  With a simple loop,
  I’m quickly found.
  What am I?
  A Needle!
• I have a point,
  but I’m not sharp,
  I’m made of metal and spin with art.
  What am I?
  A Sewing Machine!
• I’m a small tool with a cutting edge,
  I trim excess threads,
  my job I never hedge.
  What am I?
  Thread Snips!
• I’m long and slender, but not a snake,
  Through fabric I glide,
  leaving stitches in my wake.
  What am I?
  A Sewing Needle!
• I’m a puzzle of patterns,
  colorful and neat,
  Stitch by stitch,
  I’m brought to complete.
  What am I?
  A Quilt!
• I’m Made of Wood,
  twisted and round,
  Unravel me and stitches can be found.
  What am I?
  A Spool of thread!
• I’m sharp and shiny,
  used with care,
  Through fabric layers,
  I dare to tear.
  What am I?
  A Seam Ripper!

Quilting Jokes

• Why did the quilter bring a ladder to the quilt show?
  To reach new heights in patchwork!
• What’s a quilter’s favorite exercise?
  Fabric aerobics – stretching, bending, and reaching for that perfect piece!
• How do quilters stay warm in the winter?
  They cozy up with their patchwork quilts of course!
• How did the quilting bee turn into a party?
  Because the thread got all twisted up and decided to celebrate!
• What’s a quilter’s favorite book genre?
  Fabric-tion – stories woven with threads of imagination!

I guess robots can have a sense of humor after all… these were pretty good! Let me know your favorite in the comments below!

Help Others Find This Post!